I Should Never Watch a Scary Movie

I was walking down the street, minding my own business on a nice, sunny day when this crazy lady cursed me. The lady looked sweet— brown hair, blue eyes, and a nice smile.

Every first day of the month I have a nightmare. On December 1st, I had my first nightmare.

There were clowns everywhere—not the ones that are fun, but the giant, scary ones you see in scary movies. I was terrified! The thing was I could not wake up until my alarm clock rang. Ring! Ring! Then I could get out of the nightmare trance. I told people about it, but they thought I was crazy. Am I?

I saw the lady who cursed me every time the nightmare started. She was not sweet. It was hard because I knew the nightmare was coming. She had a black, ripped dress on with no shoes, with feet covered in dirt and messed up hair. I felt helpless, like I could not to go to sleep, but I did end up sleeping.

I went to the store and I saw the lady who cursed me. I ran after her furiously. The day before the first nightmare I had started to drink coffee. I drank cups the size of buckets. When that didn’t work, I watched my favorite show, but that didn’t work either. Nothing worked!

I screamed after her like a crazy person and said, “Give me my life back!”

I tackled her to the ground.

She said, “This is all a dream and this never happened.”

I woke up and it was the day I thought I got cursed.

Then I realized that the plot of my dream/ nightmare was like a movie. I realized that the lady looked familiar; she was my old best friend from preschool.

I hit my head with my hand and said out loud, “I’m never going to watch another scary movie again.”

Here is a guide to help you not get scary dreams:

WARNING: DO NOT READ UNLESS YOU WANT TO DREAM.

—Step One: Get a warm cup of milk and drink the milk—not hot or cold, but just right.

—Step Two: Go to bed. Whatever you do, do not think of something bad, or you will have a nightmare.

—Step Three: Think of something good and sleep. (Unicorns might help.)

NOTE: DO NOT THINK ABOUT FALLING OR YOU WILL GET SCARED. (REALLY SCARED!) HAPPY DREAMING, DUDES & DUDETTES